Ron Jeremy & the Fount of Useless Knowledge

1) Speaking of movies, if you ever rent a Docurama documentary, the DVD includes a huge catalog of trailers to watch which is how I happened upon the only RJ movie I have ever seen, "The Legend of Ron Jeremy". Many years ago, I thought I had seen him. An old boyfriend wanted to watch a porno a friend had lent to him and never having seen one, I wanted to know what all the fuss was all about. My impression was that it was a remarkably boring series of 30s scenes of bizarrely augmented Barbie women primped, bleached, painted within an inch of their lives pretending to have a very good time with men who--although they obviously spent some time at the gym--couldn't otherwise be bothered to shave their backs. I pointed out one particularly ugly dude who looked just like a muscular Shane McGowan (I love you, Shane, I do not wish to see you naked -->). He told me it was the legendary RJ who was so unspeakably hideous he was known as "The Hedgehog". In fact, old boyfriend had no idea what he was talking about and RJ is just that balding, dumpy dude who shows up in tiny cameo roles in movies.

2) I have no idea what people see when they meet me, apparently she is smarter, kinder, gentler, sheltered, shy and prudish, certainly not someone who has a sense of humor, kicks people for fun, lifts weights or spontaneously re-enacts Mrs. Conclusion/Mrs. Premise skits with her best friend. Anyway - my doppelganger probably is good at remembering useful information like important historical figures, molarity calculations, her zip code etc. when in fact all that has been crowded out by things like Pogues lyrics, bizarre phrases in foreign languages, and pointless useless fascinating facts on all subjects.

3) Did you know........."Jeremy" is his middle name, he was not a bad looking guy when he was young, he is a terrible comedian, he is a Jew. I'm looking forward to springing this useless knowledge on the unsuspecting.... I wonder how many people name their hedgehogs 'Ron Jeremy'?
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Sunday-
9:00 GoLean, Metabolic Drive
12:00 br rice, peas, gr beef
3:00 Spirutein, lactaid [BLARGH!]
6:00 huge party at parents'